James Harmer

In the long run…  I wonder how things will be.  I wonder what I’ll be doing next year…  or in forty years for that matter!  My entries lately have this sort of theme…  I’ve noticed it, and it’s why I’m not writing as much.  Topics seem to go away, and I seem to say over and over in different ways “I wonder what I’m going to do next…  things are weird.”  And they are indeed weird…  weird in bad ways and weird in good ways.  Right now it’s like a 60/40 balance of good/bad type of weirdness.  Weird huh?  I thought so.

Well, with this entry I figured I wouldn’t mask the question at all and pretend to have a general topic…  I’d just ask the question, or rather make the statement.  I am confused right now, more than ever before.  But you know what else?  I’m happier than ever before!  I don’t know exactly how to explain it other than to say that it’s all driven me to the cross, and to Christ.  I guess the biggest thing that’s happened is I’m realizing more and more of my potential…  preaching for the first time…  and seeing people come to the altar, leading worship at church, discipling people.  My gifts are really maturing and I guess I’m being forced to grow up along with them…  they sort of demand responsibility(what’s that?)  I got a call this morning from YFC, I’m being asked to do another event for Youth again.  I also have this vision in my heart for something that I will be talking to them about…  sort of an event.

On my mind lately…  has been the topic of relationships.  Something I used to talk about allot, and I mean allot!!  If you know me, or have for the last few years…  you know that’s true.  Well, for over a year and a half now I haven’t been…  except for a few occasions, I’ve been mostly observing, and talking to myself, and trying to hear from other people on it.  And taking note of what the Bible really says about it, which is allot more than I thought.  A relationship is one of the most beautiful, ugly, amazing, horrible, loving, painful, timid, bold, good and bad things in existence.  But one thing for sure, it’s never neutral.  Some time I will elaborate…  that is just a summary.

What else?

well…  not much that I can write about.  I am 100% convinced, still and unwavering after 4 years that I am going to do full-time music ministry.  How it will work out?  I have not a clue my friends…  we will see, we will see indeed.

Other than that?  I need to go read my Bible, practice guitar and go to sleep!

-James’